25 Minute Instant Pot Turkey Chilli

I detest having to read though paragraph after paragraph about how so and so’s brothers, cousins, ex-wifes aunt passed on the recipe sworn to secrecy they wouldn’t share or the whirlwind of a grocery shop the writer had to go through just to get to the recipe. Oh and the countless ads that get in the way!? Heck no.

So. here it is. My 25 minute instant pot turkey chilli recipe Sans BS

Ingredients:

2 tbsp olive oil

1 medium Onion, chopped

3 cloves of garlic, minced

2 lbs lean ground turkey

2 cups chicken broth

1 Can Navy Beans (rinsed)

1 Can Red Kidney Beans (rinsed)

1 28oz can diced tomatoes

1 Jalapeno pepper (deseeded & chopped) you can also use canned, chop up about 4 tbsp

1 1/2 tbsp cumin

1 tbsp chile powder

salt and pepper to taste

2 cups old cheddar cheese shredded

cilantro, for garnish (optional but I highly recommend it)

Plain Greek yogurt or sour cream for the topper (optional but its not the same without it)

How to make the damn thing:

Turn your instant pot on using the saute function – Add Olive Oil

Saute onions until translucent (approx 4-5min)

Add Garlic – stir until it smells delish

Add Ground turkey & brown until cooked through. Most turkey is quite lean but if you are cooking defrosted turkey or a fattier turkey you may need to drain to really get it browned (browning makes things taste way better btw)

Add Chicken broth, beans, tomatoes, jalapenos, cumin, chile poder, salt & pepper. Stir that baby together like you mean it.

Place cover on & lock into place. Make sure your steam valve is closed. Choose manual for 25 minutes. Once done, I usually just let it naturally release for approximately 2 minutes and then I open the valve (just be super careful to not burn yourself… Also, I warned you so no liability over here!)

Okay well I technically lied – it’s not really a 25 minute chilli. Its more like a 38.5 minute chilli if you want to get technical with prep time. But hey – It’s quicker than leaving your slow cooker on for 8 hours.

Serve in bowls sprinkled with a generous amount of cheese, a dollop (I love that word) of plain greek yogurt or sour cream & sprinkle with cilantro.

Keeping it healthier? Go easy on the cheese & opt for the greek yogurt instead

ENJOY!

Keep it ; Classy Chicken | Recipe

This is my famous (used to be my mothers but I’ve officially claimed this fame for myself lol) chicken caserole recipe. It is so delicious you will have to serve it at least once per week, or at least I have to! Enjoy!

Ingredients:

4 chicken breasts (cubed and seasoned with salt and pepper)

3 cloves garlic finely chopped

2 cups chopped(in half) baby carrots 

2 cups broccoli pieces (bite sized)

1 can cream of chicken soup

1 can cream of broccoli & cheddar soup 

1 cup mayonnaise (not the miracle whip stuff, it’s too sweet)

1.5 tbsp (not teaspoon… I messed this up before, it’s not the same) curry powder

2-3 cups Medium cheddar cheese, shredded (depends on how cheesy you want your dish)

Cooked rice – jasmine, or basmati ( amount determined by how many you will be serving)

Instructions:

Preheat oven for 400.

Steam carrots and broccoli until slightly soft. Do not over cook as they will be soggy in your casserole… and no one likes a soggy casserole.
Begin your rice cooking process. (Instructions are located in the bag 🙂

Brown chicken cubes in frying pan with oil and garlic while your broccoli is steaming 

Mix cans of soup, mayo, and curry powder in a dish.

Layer ingredients in glass baking dish (chicken, veggies and then soup mixture- distributing this evenly over chicken and veggies) 

Sprinkle cheese evenly over dish. 

Bake for 15-20 min (until cheese is melted and the soup mixture is bubbling)

Serve over rice. 

Hey you! Retail public! [A message from a car salesmans spouse]

The feeling of the cool spring air brushing past your face as you drive down the smooth ash-vault path; foot steadily on the gas pedal pressing you closer into your seat. The long red dial ticking clockwise as the roar of the motor envelops your ears. The crisp smell of fresh fabric and newly fabricated leather paneling. The excitement you get when the color, options and sparkling set of rims are calling out to you; the perfect new ride.

This is all a part of this experience we called…. Buying a new vehicle!

Now. Maybe this is not the feeling you get when YOU are buying a new car. Maybe it’s as simple as you need an update from your old vehicle, your current one is no longer safe, or large enough for your growing family. Or maybe, you do feel this way and you are excited about your car buying experience…Maybe you have a passion for every detail that has been thought out and put into making your future purchase one to turn heads.

For some, buying a car is daunting; terrifying if you will. The image of a middle aged, overweight, pushy, partially unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt wearing, guy named Morty, is often what pops into a lot of consumers heads when they think of a car salesman. I can guarantee you…. this is something you see in a late 1980’s movie depicting a “typical” car salesman; and may possibly be accurate for 2% of the sales population. Another interesting stereotype is that ALL salesman in the automotive industry are liars and will try and take advantage of you in your excited car buying frenzied state. Well, yes…. There are (unfortunately) some who, do infact, try and overcharge or make more money on a sale than what is reasonably fair. But that’s like saying all mothers should be banned from giving their children cold medicine because a small group of incompetent parents used it as a tool to get them to sleep (this is an actual example that happened… but yes we still have access to cold medication). Why? Because not all parents are the same. Neither are doctors, lawyers, McDonald’s counter staff members and salesman, to name a few examples. Educate yourselves… You’ll see what I’m talking about.

Now, for my point of view. I love my passionate, enthusiastic, charger driving, car magazine buying, talk for 2 hours before bed about new products on the market automotive salesman of a boyfriend. Now this is a man who is truly passionate about what he does; what he sells. Countless evenings I have listened to the low rumbling sound of an engine bellowing from youtube and the marvelous child like giggle he gets when the driver presses down on the gas pedal and the sharp sputter and whip of the exhaust hits you deep in your chest. Our grocery list includes the latest edition of motor trend as do birthday and Christmas wish lists. He is not alone in this feeling. Many people who have chosen this career too, genuinely LOVE cars. But slowly, I am seeing his light fade; his excitement to go to work waiver. This is not because of the products he sells. It has nothing to do with his coworkers, or management. Not because of his hours, or pay (which BTW to all you consumers out there…. Car salesmen Do Not make a dime if they do not sell… which equates to many unpaid hours spent at work).

What is the reason you ask?  Well… It’s because of you. Retail public. Consumers. Those of you who have no concept of keeping or canceling an appointment. No respect for others time or effort. Those of you who lack communication skills and the capability to be honest about what you are looking for, your commitment to buying, and your financial situation. Don’t get me wrong, a part of their job is to give you their time and attention to help you buy the right vehicle, one that you will be excited about, one that you can financially handle. But if you find yourself being described in any of the above statements, then you have no business stepping foot in a dealership unless you clearly state: ” I am not buying today, or anytime soon, thank you”.

A few other reasons you should not be stepping into a dealership:

-You owe large sums of money to debt collectors or are not up to date on your child support.

-You have claimed bankruptcy in the last 3 years, or had a vehicle repossessed in the last year; especially not  in the last 2 months! (yes this has happened)

-You just want to sit in the new Charger Hellcat that is on display in the show room.

-You want to test drive a car with no intention of buying.

-They offer great tasting coffee, their balloons are keeping your kids occupied and it’s raining out.

– You want to know the value of your trade in before even looking at a new car; and the trade in isn’t even yours, it’s your moms.

-You are looking to buy next year. But want a full and detailed descriptions of what’s available on the lot now.

I do realize that our views of things differentiate due to our individual perception. Our brains forming ideas and opinions based on our surroundings, experiences and stories from other people’s view. So I apologize for my previous rant. But there’s a perspective you don’t get to see. And from a commission sales point of view, life, in this industry can be incredibly stressful. You are fully depending on the public to be able to pay your bills and take care of your family. This business can be incredibly lucrative, with hard work, time and determination. But again, with dependence on the public. I suppose my whole point in writing this is to hit these key points:

1. Your time is not just your time.

2. We humans have not developed the ability to read minds. Be honest. It’s disappointing when a sales person is expecting a sale (sometimes putting off other customers for you, and possibly losing another sale) and then you really weren’t interested or we’re hiding some financial problems to the very end hoping it won’t be noticed. BTW: you are applying for a loan! Of course your credit will come into account! Be aware of your financial status! Not just for the salesman’s well being but for the rest of society.

3. He or She has other places they would like to be; their children’s hockey games or school concerts. Family events, holidays etc. be prompt and on time!

4. Don’t ask for more than what you are willing to pay for. They need to keep their lights on too… They are after all running a business. If you want leather seats and navigation… You are going to have to pay more. You don’t go to Walmart and negotiate on the price of a BBQ! Then ask them to throw in the BBQ sauce and tool set for free! You’re lucky they can make things work for your budget the best they can.

5. If you are shopping around, just say it. It will waste less of your time and your salesman. They are most likely wanting to keep your sale and will work to get you the best price they can. And hey, if a guy has spent a ton of time on you, and you do go look at prices somewhere else, let him know. It’s common courtesy. And you never know, maybe there’s something else they could do for you? Either way. Be respectful.

6. Other dealerships will always give you more for your trade to win you over. They just hide the cost in your final numbers. Be aware of this. Be aware of what you are paying for, read everything before you sign, and ask for a breakdown.
So to sum this up, please take this post to heart. Have fun buying your new car, but keep in mind, the person you are dealing with is also a human, with goals and bills to pay. Not only will this make a way better experience for you, you will gain a salesman you can trust and depend on to provide you with a vehicle that isn’t going to put you in the hole. They work hard to gain repeat business and referrals, it’s how commission sales works!

 

Avoiding heartbreak.

I called my mother last week to update her on the latest quotes I gathered from conversations with the kids, how my new job was going and to get an update on how she was feeling after her latest chemo treatment.
“How are you, dear?” She asked with her always genuinely inquisitive tone.
“I’m great Mumsy, but I have anxiety” I replied hesitantly, attempting to avoid triggering any motherly worry that doesn’t go away even when your child has children, and is 28 years old.

“Why? Is something going on? What’s wrong?”

And at that point I realized, nothing. Absolutely nothing is wrong. For the first time, in 10 years, everything was just as it should be (other than my ex having a baby with a woman he’s no longer with… But that’s another post) I have a stable job, one that allows me to pick the kids up at a decent time from daycare, be off on Friday at 430 and have the entire weekend to do what ever I please, a boyfriend whom although we just started dating makes me feel incredibly happy and lucky.
So why on earth am I anxious?
A good example to use is someone who is struggling with debt and then is lucky enough to win the lottery. The majority of the time, within a short period of time, this person will find themselves back in debt; this time with guilt and frustration that they allowed themselves to fall back into the same bad habits. We are creatures of habit. Our brains and chemical makeups adapt to our situations and surroundings to protect us, to keep us alive. When you are in a constant state of panic and stress your body adapts, becoming accustomed to the feeling. This causes us to end up back where we started because that is where we are comfortable, in a state of panic; which is ironic since you would think that would be the reason for anxiety. The term “breaking the cycle” is so very true.

The anxiety that comes with being in a place of “normalcy” (whatever normal may mean to each person varies) is to be expected. The key is to acknowledge this anxiety and realize that it is temporary. The hard part is not giving in and placing yourself back on the same path you started on.

Now for the title of this blog. A main source of my anxiety, I realized is avoiding heartbreak. A part of what I have always felt my normal would be considered is to have a consistent routine, a stable job, well behaved children and a healthy, mutually loving and giving relationship. Now that last part… Relationship. There is nothing more terrifying and confusing than a new relationship when you have children. I keep telling myself to relax, take a deep breath and let things fall into place. But every so often that little voice in my head says “brace yourself, you are about to have your heart broken”. Is this because of what I was referring to earlier; my mind reverting back to what I’m used to? Am I going to be my own demise in this relationship because I’m already expecting failure?.
My main goal is to break this cycle and to remind myself that I deserve to be happy and loved. That the man I chose to have in my life, in my children’s lives is just as lucky as I am to have them in mine. And maybe, heart break will have to avoid me.

Products of our environment.

Place a goldfish in a small bowl… It stays small. Place a goldfish in a large pond and it will more than triple it’s size.

Us humans (for the most part) are very much the same. We are incredibly impressionable, sometimes in the best way and other times in the worst. Situate yourself around drama filled, gossiping, negative people and eventually you will be subconsciously dragged into the same perpetual motion. I see this all the time. You become comfortable in the idea that it’s normal behavior, that everyone is like this and well… You shouldn’t expect any more. A great example of this is religion but that’s an entirely separate blog post.

The opposite situation happens when you situate yourself around moral driven, successful, positive people. You gain a sense of healthy competition, positivity, and higher your standards of what you will accept and gain the strength to make the choice to move away from anything different.

The problem therein lies that more often than not, people are negative and not many people are aware of being a product of their environment. Our moral standards as a society are then dragged down.

I’m not quite sure where I’m going with this blog post.
I suppose it’s to make a point…. And my point is that we need to educate ourselves, and our future humans (yes… I’m referring to children lol) to restore the balance of negative and positive; preferably tipping more towards the positive.

Social media portrays do gooders and positive/ inspiring quotes making us feel and seem like we are a loving, positive and compassionate race …. For example the ice bucket challenge. I can guarantee that more than 70% of the ice water drenched video subjects had/ have absolutely no idea what ALS ( Lou Gehrig’s disease) is. And I doubt more than 10-15% of them actually donated money to the cause. Yes, I will admit, it was a great cause, and blew up social media. It brought awareness to this crippling disease, but it also caused people to think they are gaining some sort of karma by instagramming/ facebooking their freezing cold endeavor, giving us a very skewed view on how corrupt, demoralized and negative our society has become.

But I digress….. I suppose my purpose in writing this is to make you, the reader, think about who you surround yourself with. To make you aware of the power and strength you have to walk away from this insanity and to refuse to perpetuate this parasitic behavior. We all have a choice to steer away from anything that doesn’t move us forward in a healthy and positive way. In turn this will have a domino effect and just maybe, my faith in people, humanity will be restored.

Raising a gentleman.

Yesterday Vienna sobbed. Not a few tears but a full on lip quivering, waterfall tears, hiccup sob.
As a new assistant manager for a restaurant my hours are not the easiest on a 7&8 year old…. Or myself for that matter. My hour start times vary from mornings to Afternoons and sometimes closes which keep me until 130am.

Vienna has had a hard time adjusting to this. Coupled with a new daycare, and a new school, it all seems too much for her.

As I pulled into the drop off lane with one hand on the steering wheel, and one cupped in her little hand, fingers digging into mine, I comforted her in the fact I would be home after work with enough time to sing her to sleep.

She kept sobbing, looking down at her feet, tearing at my heart. As a single mother I had a choice, work a job that kept me for 5 hours while they are at school and live paycheque to paycheque or pursue a career that would help me save for the future and provide them with medical and dental. The choice was obvious, although I pondered if it was the right thing to do…. As I do with almost every decision I make.

And then there was Landen. My sweet, caring, strong compassionate boy. He got out, opened Vienna’s door, grasped her hand and helped her out. I gave them both a huge kiss and hug and reassured them I would see them later.

Landen reached into his pocket and pulled out a black and white camouflaged army man and placed it in the wet palm of Vienna’s hand.
“Take my army man Vienna, look at him and remember I am in the class down the hall… But put him in your backpack so no other boys steal it” he spoke to her with softness and love.

I couldn’t help but tear up at this gesture. What an incredible young man I have raised.

They both said goodbye and Landen walked beside his little sister who was still sobbing, but a little less now. He placed his right hand on the back of her neck moving his fingers back and fourth as his left hand held on to hers with comfort. They disappeared around the corner and I felt a sense of relief knowing that he was walking her to her class room, that she wasn’t alone.

Now Landen has always been a sensitive boy. He cries when I am hurt, he knows when I’ve had a bad day. He buys my coffee in the morning (when I let him) and offers to pay for dinners when he can tell we are eating somewhere that’s a little more expensive than usual. He is the man I had hoped to raise, and he is only 8.

He is a gentleman. I have spent the last 8 years making sure to teach him about respect (especially towards women), about being vulnerable, loving unconditionally, and being generous. In one moment he showed me that all of my hard work had payed off.

I think this is what we are lacking in our society when raising boys. We assume we need to teach them to be tough, to play sports, to get dirty and well to be boys. And this is so very wrong. Boys will be boys, on their own. But boys will not grow to be GENTLEmen unless we teach them to be that way. To own their feelings, to acknowledge others feelings, and to comfort and love others.

I am proud to say, and have no doubt, my little man, will grow up to, one day, be a loving caring husband and father (if that’s what he choses).

And not only that, he will help others to feel loved and comforted.
Vienna will have an amazing example of how a man should treat her and expect no less. And all because I have raised a gentleman.

How babies are made and other answers for curious 7 & 8 year olds.

As my children cringed from the dining room table with a sickened look on their faces, I second guessed my choice of letting them watch one of my favorite childhood movies ; look who’s talking.

“Ohhh sick!!! Why are they cutting that cord! What’s happening to that baby!?” Landen frantically yelled as he covered his eyes with his little hands still covered in sour cream from eating his overly stuffed burrito.
“Well the cord is attached to the mother and that’s how the blood and food is supplied to the baby. That’s why we have a belly button”.

“I don’t want a belly button!!! That’s so gross” Vienna retorted. As usual, her responses come out in the sassiest of tones. “How did the baby get in her tummy in the first place!?” She asked with interest.

This is a time in a mother (or parents) life where they have to chose wether to be completely honest, or use their best deflection skills. Now I have prided myself on being the first. My children are the way they are because of the lessons I have taught them every day. So I chose to explain with the truth… Just the PG version.

“Well, when a man and a woman love each other they decide to mix their DNA together. This happens by the man giving his sperm to fertilize the egg that the woman has. The cells duplicate and grow and a baby is formed”. They both stared at me for a moment, no doubt processing what I had said.
“Oh okay! Like the DNA that we watched in the documentary right!?” Landen responded.
I was so proud to see that what I have taught them, or encouraged them to learn was something he remembered, and not only that, he understood.

“So mom.. You know those torpedo things we saw on the commercial?” (Referring to the tampax commercial that had played over and over again between our TV movie we had been watching) “those are used when a woman is ready to have a baby, but isn’t pregnant yet?” Vienna enquired.

I was in shock…. A little nervous might I add that my children are 7&8 and already know about baby making and periods. But at the same time, I felt comfort in the fact my children will not be blindsided by these things of nature. Their minds are open, and yearning to understand the world and all it’s details.

“Yes Vienna that is correct.” I responded.

“Oh…. Okay” she replied as she took another huge bite of her dinner as if our conversation was nothing out of the norm.

As I watched them take in the rest of the movie…yelling “ahhh bad word” every time Kirsty Alley dropped an “S” bomb…. I felt an overwhelming sense of control and pride. I can have an open and honest relationship with my children. A relationship that will allow them to tell me anything, to ask me anything, and to trust that my reaction or response will be one without judgement or lies.
I want them to know that life is what it is, it’s safe if you are aware of what’s going on and are not in blissful ignorance.

I can only imagine how the questions are going to develop over the next few years. And I hope, I am not pegged as the “mom who’s kids tell the other kids about periods and babies” at school. Haha
But I suppose, in the end, my children will thrive in having this knowledge and hopefully as they grow will seek out as much information and facts as they can on their own.

Single motherhood.

I woke up a few mornings ago to Landen screaming in pain as he walked through my bedroom door, holding his red little hand. “Mumma…Vienna hit me with the remote!!!!”.

These are times I feel I am walking around in a state of panic. When having children one of the many things you should be told is that; if you decided to have more than one, be sure to stop by the sporting goods store and pick up a black and white striped referee jersey… Because half the time, that’s what role you will be playing.

As always my first step was to discover what prompted Vienna to lash out.
As per usual, Landen wanted to watch a boy show, and Vienna wanted to watch a girl show. So she wacked him, hard.
Why? I have no idea. We have gone over the subject of violence, and how
Important it is to “use our words” at least 100 times.

But yet she felt a rush of anger and lashed out. I too, at times, feel this rush of anger. The need to walk right up to some one and smack them right in the mouth. But I have been given this amazing thing called restraint and the ability to comprehend that hurting someone else is so very wrong. The feeling that burns in your chest, and makes your face raw is your minds physical way of telling you that what is happening at that moment isn’t right or comfortable.

Sometimes I wonder if when we say “man it was so much easier as a kid”, it’s because we yearn to feel these raw, unfiltered emotions and be able to lay them all out on the table without censor.
I wonder if maybe that ability ( not the ability to smack someone in the mouth of course) would allow me to tackle the issues that come with being a single mom. Don’t get me wrong, I know everyone, even parents in relationships deal with the issues I do, and I’m not feeling sorry for myself, but it’s me conquering the crazy world of parenting alone, and it’s hard as hell.

I try to be raw, honest, truthful, and straight forward, but there is always that adult voice in my head saying “don’t hurt someone else”. Weather it’s with words or actions, it’s a fine line between protecting yourself, and hurting others.

So in the end, Vienna got a time out, and Landen a frozen bag of mixed vegetables. We settled on a compromise, a movie that was suited for the two of them, which of course prompted them, as per usual, to become best friends again.

I think the key… To being a single mom is to be honest with yourself… To be honest about what you need, want and deserve and do your best along the way not to hurt anyone else in that process.

Crazy to think that not only am I teaching my kids… I’m learning so much for myself at the same time.

The terrors of house hunting.

Wow… Just wow.

As I sift through the pages of craigslist… Tears trickling down my cheeks, I realize how daunting of a task it is house hunting as a single mom.

The next day, armed with my schedule of showings (8 to be exact), I pick the kids up from school and declare our plan for the evening. “Mummy needs you guys to be extra good while we look at houses okay? And tell me which one is your favorite!”. “Yes mumma” they both reply in unison.

We arrive at the first apartment and park in the visitor parking zone. As I look up, the first thing I see are 2 fire trucks and a dozen rough, disheveled onlookers. Always a good first impression. I help the kids out of my dads borrowed jeep and lock the doors, checking twice as I grasp the kids hands firmly and walk towards the front door.
10 min late an older gentleman approaches. Gentle lines around his eyes exaggerate as he smiles and says “Alyssa? I’m Jim, you are here too look at the place?”
“We … are!” I hesitantly replied…. I was contemplating saying “no sorry, my name is barb, I’m just waiting for someone” but I refrained and decided to give the place a shot.

He opened the front doors and escorted us to the elevator. The walls were cigarette stain beige, the carpets looked like they used to be light grey but were now a warn down dark brown.
I felt a strong tug at my arm and looked to see landen motion with his pointer finger to come closer. “Mumma…this place smells and there’s writing scratched into the elevator door” he whispered.
I chuckled to myself, no doubt a natural reaction to how uncomfortable his adult like observation made me feel.

Jim proceeded to tell us about how tight knit the apartment community was; “we even have a BBQ every month with the neighborhood crime watch!” He exclaimed excitedly. I think at that point I may have thrown up in my mouth slightly.

We quickly checked out the small
Apartment, still under construction. It was a decent size for our little family but was old and needed a lot of work for the price. I thanked Jim for his time and left him to install the new Walmart special vanity he purchased for the bathroom.

As we took the elevator down, both kids were visibly agitated and I could tell they were disheartened that this was a glimpse at what our future home would be like.

On to the next 2 apartments and 5 basement suites… All of which were complete holes. Too small, too dirty, bad neighborhood.
As I sobbed outside of the truck where the kids couldn’t see, I texted my sister “ugh, I feel like I’m in the movie 8 mile” to which she responded “you’ve only got one shot….one opportunity… Bom bom bommmm”. I laughed as I wiped the tears off my cheeks and climbed back in the car. “I’m sooooo hungry I think I’m dying” said Vienna with an over dramatic tone. I wished at that moment I wasn’t alone, that I was able to have someone watch them so I could look at all these places without the guilt of carting two kids around.

Half way home my phone rang. It was the gentleman I had left a message with regarding a 1200sq ft basement suite with a full backyard and hot tub.
The price was too good to be true, 750$ everything included, cable, Internet the works! He asked if I would like to come see it.
At this point I was drained, the kids were
miserable and hungry. But I decided to check it out, it could be the one after all.

As soon as we walked through the door I felt at home. It was clean, had a cozy living room, huge open kitchen, and the bedrooms were the perfect size. I had 100$ in my wallet and handed it to him within the first 10 min without hesitation.

Thankfully he was willing to hang on to it for me for a month so I could figure out the lease at the old house.

After everything, all the tears and complaints from the kids, we found our new home. I didn’t realize what an emotional journey it would be.

It’s been almost a month and a half since we’ve moved in and I have not felt this at home in a long time.

I will write about the joys of moving an entire 5 bedroom house while working and balancing kids in my next post!

Another challenge conquered, many more to go, but I know I will power through each of them!

The one thing I kept telling myself through this entire process was “breathe…..Alyssa…just breathe”

Breathe.

Staff room conversations with my acupuncturist.

As I struggle to untangle the sheets from the dryer that decided wrap themselves into a tightly spun rope, Richard, our office acupuncturist walks through the door.

“Hahaha, wat are yoo doing?” He says with a huge grin and thick Chinese accent. I’m sure I must have scared him when my eyes met his, angry, frustrated and unamused.

“The stupid sheets got all tangled and now I have to dry the load all over again…how frustrating” I grumbled as he continued to smile and chuckle.

Richard is the type of man who bows when he first greets you, is always smiling and seems to see the world through a different set of eyes. He is an incredible acupuncturist and I have yet to meet anyone who is as knowledgable in Chinese medicine and spirituality. He is generous, calm, insightful. Just being in his presence makes you feel as though not one of your troubles can or will affect you.

Leaning against the counter observing me tugging and ripping at the tangled sheets, he crossed his arms and observed me getting increasingly frustrated. I look up and say: “Richard, don’t you ever get frustrated? About anything? Ever?”

He simply uncrossed his arms, walked over, and grabbed one end of the bundle. Gently spinning it the opposite way till the sheets unwind and come apart.
“No, I don’t. Everything has it’s purpose. Everything happens to teach us, to help us grow. Why get mad at the tangled sheets, just breathe, and untangle them slowly, one sheet at a time. So what you have to start over by re drying them, in the end they will be dry and in order.” I sighed with a slight annoyance that he is always right. He noticed and continued talking. “It is simple, it is yin and yang, it is the bad and the good.. Without the darkness how will you know how bright you can shine?”

And as always a calm rushed over me.
So simple,
So true,
So easy.
Why is it so hard to “untangle” our brains and just think this way with every day life.
Weather it’s taking a deep breath and not getting angry at the 54th plastic yogurt top thrown and stuck to the floor after my kids devour the container without a spoon… Or the car at the green light clearly busy texting and not paying attention.
Breathe…. Just breathe.

I think this needs to be something I practice every hour of every day.

There is a reason, a purpose, a lesson with every hardship we go through. The key is finding what that is, and to learn from it.

Till my next post,

Alyssa